Five Boys and a Princess: June 2011

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Where's Liddia?

Liddia found a picture of the boyz holding Benjamin when he was a new born. She found me held up the picture and asked “Liddia?” I told her “Liddia was in China, but was in Mommy’s heart.” That was good for her, but it made me think. Where was Liddia when Ben was born. She would have been just 13 months old. My heart aches. Was she held when she cried at night? What was she like? Did she have her contagious laugh like she has now? When she got hurt did someone kiss her better? Was she loved? Did she feel loved or was she just surviving?

I have one photo copied picture of Liddia when she was a new born baby, probably taken hours or days after she was found. It is ½ inch squared. That is all we have! We do have lots of pictures of her from when Half The Sky joined her orphanage, but tiny baby pictures one. How will this make her feel as she gets older? When she looks at our family photo albums and sees all of the boyz as babies and not any of her how will she feel? How do I help her heal? My heart aches.

In my journal from December 15 2007 I wrote about the increased anxiety I was having about Liddia, I just wanted to “run and get her the way I run to Max when he gets hurt.” Liddia’s birthday is listed as December 15, 2007. I knew she needed me, even then. Liddia has always been my daughter, she had to come to our family a different way… a harder way… a much harder way... but I believe everything fits together for a purpose. Either way it is just the same.

Just The Same by Lynn Lacey

Sometimes—

God sends rain

Straight from the sky

To nourish the young flower

and it grows.

Sometimes—

God sends rain from the sky

To the mountaintops,

Then over hills and through valleys

Until it reaches the flower

and it grows, just the same.

Sometimes—

God sends a child

Straight from His realm

Into a mother’s arms

and love grows.

Sometimes—

God sends a child

From heaven to another’s arms,

Then over hills and through valleys

Until she reaches the arms of her mother

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Look What Can Happen In Three Months

On March 31 2011 Xin Xiao Yu finally was in my arms.
Who looks more stressed out me or Liddia?

Twelve weeks ago our Liddia was in an orphanage in Urumqi China
with no family, now she is loved beyond measure!!! We are
truly mother and daughter.

What an amazing journey we have been on. I have been reflecting a lot about how we were put onto this path and how at any point we could have made a u-turn. But there was something inside of me that could not break my stride. I knew my little girl was at the end of this bumpy path, and I needed to just get her. I wanted to hold her in my arms and kiss her sweet face.

Now that we are home I get to hold her everyday, see her sweet smile, and kiss her adorable face. I know she is my daughter. In fact sometimes I hold her and we look into the mirror and I am shocked to see really how different we look. I am not sure what I expect to see, but what I see and feel are so different. Liddia and I are connected in a way that that I can not put into words. She is my daughter just as the Lord knew she would be.

I love her! She is amazing! She has a tender heart, yet she has a determined soul. She is sweet and loving. She is soft and funny. She loves to laugh and at times cry too. She loves to be carried outside by her brothers. (I think they help her feel safe. Heavenly Father knew what he was doing when he gave her so many brothers to protect her. She doesn't need to do it alone anymore.)

As are family starts this new journey of grafting together I am filled with the a new kind of determination. The determination to mold our family into what our Heavenly Father has in mind for us. I have never doubted His love for me or my family, but I never really knew just how much he loves his children until I saw Him in the details of our journey to Liddia. I have learned yet again that His Ways are always so much better than our own. The trick is to trust HIS WAYS!

Our Maui Trip At A Glance

My brother has an amazing woman that truly completes him. On Christmas Eve of last year he asked her to marry him and they decided to get married in Maui. So on Sunday June 12 the eight of us made journey to this tropical paradise. It was a dream vacation for our family. We loved every minute of every day. The boyz were a little emotional as we left for the airport to go home.