Where's Liddia?

Liddia found a picture of the boyz holding Benjamin when he was a new born. She found me held up the picture and asked “Liddia?” I told her “Liddia was in China, but was in Mommy’s heart.” That was good for her, but it made me think. Where was Liddia when Ben was born. She would have been just 13 months old. My heart aches. Was she held when she cried at night? What was she like? Did she have her contagious laugh like she has now? When she got hurt did someone kiss her better? Was she loved? Did she feel loved or was she just surviving?


I have one photo copied picture of Liddia when she was a new born baby, probably taken hours or days after she was found. It is ½ inch squared. That is all we have! We do have lots of pictures of her from when Half The Sky joined her orphanage, but tiny baby pictures one. How will this make her feel as she gets older? When she looks at our family photo albums and sees all of the boyz as babies and not any of her how will she feel? How do I help her heal? My heart aches.

In my journal from December 15 2007 I wrote about the increased anxiety I was having about Liddia, I just wanted to “run and get her the way I run to Max when he gets hurt.” Liddia’s birthday is listed as December 15, 2007. I knew she needed me, even then. Liddia has always been my daughter, she had to come to our family a different way… a harder way… a much harder way... but I believe everything fits together for a purpose. Either way it is just the same.

Just The Same by Lynn Lacey

Sometimes—

God sends rain

Straight from the sky

To nourish the young flower

and it grows.

Sometimes—

God sends rain from the sky

To the mountaintops,

Then over hills and through valleys

Until it reaches the flower

and it grows, just the same.

Sometimes—

God sends a child

Straight from His realm

Into a mother’s arms

and love grows.

Sometimes—

God sends a child

From heaven to another’s arms,

Then over hills and through valleys

Until she reaches the arms of her mother